Tuesday 16 June 2009

Black clouds



Today was a black cloud day. I went to bed last night feeling very, very sore and stiff. I partly attribute this to eating some gluten-free cake that I think may have used a wheat flour with gluten removed (wheat makes me stiff) and a cranial and general osteopathy session I had on Friday. I know it's a while away but it was a tricky weekend with visitors, some tension etc, and I think I kept the reactions in until yesterday evening.

Today I woke up much physically better (but clumsy) yet emotionally I was a wreck. Everything I could think of was wrong and I felt quite sorry for myself. I cried a bit on and off and was very tired.

I don't know if this is a 'healing crisis', or what. At one point yesterday I even wondered if I was going down with swine flu as it is going around in the Midlands area. Gulp. Can't imagine what immune reaction I'd have to that one.

I'm almost done with the book (Conquering Arthritis) and need to prepare for the fast/reintroduction phase. Of course this has to be planned around life and not done when we have social events I can't get out off. A good friend has offered to do this with me. I wish I had a even better friend to cook for my kids whilst I'm doing it!!

I have also been reading about and practising, mindful meditation. Barbara Allen says it was a big part of her healing process and particularly used the vipasanna method which I tried today with a tape. It is a good way to control pain.

Ah well a good night sleep and no doubt tomorrow will hold a little sunshine.

1 comment:

  1. Sorry to hear about your difficult time. I always find that I have to feel sorry for myself, cry and then get mad. Once I am mad I am back to working hard. Hang in there. Better days are around the corner.

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